Thank you, Bobby Darin

I love telling stories, but lately I haven’t been able to recall any that I haven’t told before. Then, it dawned on me that I’ve shared bits and pieces about how Maurice and I met and formed our relationship, but I don’t think I’ve told it all in one clear and concise post.  If I have told this story before, you’ll have to forgive me, I’m telling it again because I like it.

Over ten years ago I ended a three year relationship.  It ended badly.  No, it ended really, really badly.  No, it ended Three Mile Island, the cops got involved and two years of therapy badly.  Toxic from beginning to end.

Maurice and I met online before I was in that terrible relationship.  We would briefly chat now and again, but each time we chatted one of us was in a relationship, so we never got together.   Maurice says he doesn’t remember any of this, but this is the way I recall it and I’m sticking with it.

When the bad relationship ended I told myself that I wasn’t getting into another one.  I wasn’t saying never again, but I swore it wasn’t going to be any time soon.  I made a conscious decision to start dating.  That was it.  Meet some nice guys, go out on a date, have some fun and that was it.  Call it a night.  Was there ever a time that people just dated?  They did in old movies and tv shows.  Nowadays they most certainly don’t.  Two or three dates and people want to be exclusive.  I knew that was exactly what I did not want.

It was not going to be easy, but I was determined to stick by my decision and it worked.  It took a while, but I developed a group of guy friends who I’d go out with from time to time.  Dinner and a movie this week with Tom – lunch and a museum next week with Jack.  Maybe sex would be involved, maybe not – no expectations.  For two years I LOVED IT.  And then one night, things changed…

I was chatting online one evening and this cute guy sent me a simple message that said “hello.”  We chatted a bit and he said he’d like to meet over coffee and I agreed.  When he walked into Starbucks I was excited.  “Wow.  This guy is hot.”  Then I remembered that he was in a relationship so I tempered my enthusiasm and resigned myself to accept that this was going to be just coffee and friendship.  DAMN!  Needless to say, the guy was Maurice.

Starbucks was packed and he admitted he didn’t like coffee, so I said, “It’s been a really tough week at work, what do you say we head down to the beach?”  He agreed it was a good idea.

It’s important to note that I had one very firm rule about dating.  If the cell phone was pulled out at anytime during the first date, that would be it.  No reaction, no comment, no drama…there just would not be a second date.  I made an exception for Maurice because he was courteous enough to tell me right away that he took care of his grandmother and he had to answer if she called.  I told him I understood.  Besides, at this point I wasn’t even sure it was a date.

When we got into his truck, Maurice asked how to get to the beach. I lived only a mile from the coast, but it would require going by foot down a steep cliff to get to the beach.  That was not a good option that late at night.  So, when he asked me where to go I told him I wasn’t sure and said, “just go that way.”  In the process we got lost on some winding, dark road and we laughed about it.  Fortunately, he found my free-spirited attitude endearing.

When we found a beach, Maurice casually mentioned his recent breakup and I practically squealed.  Yes!  It’s official!  This was a date!  It couldn’t have been a more perfect night.  The beach was practically deserted and there was a full moon.  We sat there and chatted and chatted some more.  It got chilly so we cuddled a bit and chatted some more.  It started to get downright cold so we cuddled some more and chatted some more.  We sat on the beach, under the full moon and talked for five hours.

Remember my rule regarding no cell phone usage while on a date?  Well, he was right, his grandmother called – she had Alzheimer’s so about fifteen minutes later she called again, and again and again…every single time she called she asked Maurice the same things and every single time he would repeat his responses in a calm and loving way.  I couldn’t believe it.  All I kept thinking was, “He’s a really nice guy.”

At the end of the night, when we pulled up to my place, I was thinking this guy was different, this guy was special.  As we were about to kiss goodnight a song came on the stereo.  It was Bobby Darin singing “Beyond the Sea,” Nothing could have been more perfect to end the evening. Right now, thinking about it gives me the chills – good chills.  I knew right there and then that this was kismet. He was THE one.

We’ve been together now for eight years, so it seems to be working out okay.  There is a moral to the story.  Whenever a friend tells me that they just can’t meet the right guy, or the right girl.  I tell them the magic secret that worked for me:  Have fun and stop looking.

  14 comments for “Thank you, Bobby Darin

  1. Gel
    December 8, 2013 at 07:47

    I loved reading this. Thank you for sharing it. I’ve been with my guy for 13 years (10 married). We had an amazing coming together too. I had pretty much given up at age 39 but then we met…..

    In a world where so many relationships don’t work or are dysfunctional, it’s wonderful to read about ones that do work.

    Blessings to you!

    • Bradley
      December 8, 2013 at 08:17

      Stumbling upon “the one” is an amazing feeling, isn’t it? Great job on the 13 years.

  2. December 6, 2013 at 01:26

    Thank you for sharing your lovely sweet story Bradley, it has put a smile on my face. I too went to hell and back with my first relationship, then found the sweetest man in the world and we are going on10 years together, 7 married. He was not the cookie cutter type guy I would have thought would be right for me but boy did I learn he was exactly what I needed and even better he still seems to think that I am amazing! Ain’t love grand? HUGS!!

    • Bradley
      December 6, 2013 at 07:11

      Yes, love is grand and very much worth the wait.

  3. Cat
    November 30, 2013 at 11:28

    I stopped looking many years ago, then I stood in the way of any possibilities. Reading your story was a lovely reminder of how special and wonderful it can be when we meet someone very special. Nice post, Bradley and loved the song. Was the second video meant to be there? “Boy is a Bottom” It was hilarious…cheered me up!

    • Bradley
      December 1, 2013 at 15:16

      I’m glad you enjoyed the story, Cat. No, it wasn’t suppose to roll over to the 2nd video (blush). I’m glad you got a kick out of it.

      • Cat
        December 2, 2013 at 12:03

        I loved it!

  4. aimer shama
    November 22, 2013 at 20:47

    That was meeting someone and take care of her. Stupid phone!!

  5. aimer shama
    November 22, 2013 at 20:45

    Having fun doesn’t improve the odds of messing the right person, but having fun while looking definitely beats waiting and moping. I’m glad you found your partner. I enjoyed your story and would really enjoy it if you tell us some more. Do you recall any funny incidents? And how ‘s Maurice’ s grandmother? How come he had to take off her?

    • Bradley
      November 22, 2013 at 22:28

      Maurice had to take care of her because she had Alzheimer’s. Eventually she moved to Louisiana, her home state. She lived in an assisted living care center and died several years ago. We both miss her. Don’t worry, I’ve been jotting down some stories for future posts.

  6. Bradley
    November 22, 2013 at 14:44

    I don’t know why you didn’t get the button other than I’ve been experiencing some odd things with WordPress over the past week. And yes, he is a wonderful person.

  7. November 22, 2013 at 14:24

    For some reason, I didn’t get a “like” button on the email alert to this post (which I liked).

    Maurice sounds like a wonderful person. Glad for you. (And him, obviously.)

  8. Rose
    November 22, 2013 at 11:45

    What an endearing story. Maurice sounds like a great guy! I had pretty much gave up on love when DSB and I met in a freak encounter (I’ll have to blog about it) online. Anyway, great post and cheers to true love! 😀

    • Bradley
      November 22, 2013 at 13:57

      Thank you, Rose. I’m glad you liked it, because I never get tired of telling it. I’m glad it worked out well with you DSB. I look forward to that blog someday.

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