The Darkness Fades

“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.”

William Gibson’s quote above has been one of my favorites regarding depression. Using the quote as a gauge I can definitely say I was depressed last week because I was not surrounded by assholes. The love and support I received from friends and family was overwhelming. Thank you to you all. It was one of the toughest weeks of I’ve had in a very long time.

I’ll take a break now from my mental health and talk about my physical health. I’m pretty frustrated right now. I haven’t lost any weight for a month. In fact, I’ve gained 5 pounds. On February 16th I weighed in at 212.2 pounds. This past Saturday I weighed in at 217.2 pounds. I’ve still lost a total of 86.2 pounds, but being stuck in a rut like this is making me damned irritable.

I wish I could blame it on being on a plateau, but that would be a lie. The problem is I’m not eating as healthy as I was before and I’ve cut way back on my exercise. Part of this happens to be from school and part of it is from me being lazy. I’m only 14 pounds away from reaching a 100 pound loss. It’s been so close I could taste it. The closest I’ve been was back on February 16th when I weighed in at 212.2 pounds. That was just 8 pounds away from reaching my mini goal of 100 pounds lost. (sigh)

To help me finally reach that total 100 pound weight loss, I’ve created a mini challenge. June 7 – 9 we will be at our church camp in the mountains. On the 8th there will be a group hike up to the peak of the mountain. I can’t remember the total elevation, but it’s high. I tried to achieve this hike about 7 years ago and I couldn’t make it. I think I made it just a little past half way, but then I had to stop. Well, I’m not going to let that happen this years. So here I’ll say it:

On June 8, 2013, I will be at Camp de Benneville Pines and I will be joining the hiking group and hike up to the peak of the mountain. I will make it all the way.

There it is. We’ll see what happens.  Thank you all, again, for being so supportive last weeks. Big hugs all around.

Not the actual mountain but nearby.

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