Weekly Wrap-Up November 14, 2016

weekly wrap-up

Mood

I don’t think I have to mention it, but I will. Depression, depression, depression. This time is situational and not likely to be because of the chemicals swirling around in my brain. The election was just more than I could handle. I thought it would pass, but it still hangs as heavy on my heart as much today as it did Tuesday night. It’s become more obvious that our racist, sexist, narcissistic future President plans to do as little work as possible and the people he’s surrounded himself with are just as frightening. After all, our future Vice President is an advocate for gay conversion therapy. A practice that is banned in five states. I’m trying not to get too much into politics here, but I can’t ignore it since it’s had such an impact on my mood.

I posted the other day that Maurice and I are considering leaving the country, and I had some nasty things to say about the US of A, but I’ve calmed down a bit. We’re still seriously considering moving, but I do still love my country. Like anywhere, it has its faults, but it is my home. I guess democracy in action entails risk, and with risk comes men like Donald Trump. I’m just still in shock that he won. I’ll never understand it ‘til my dying day. I guess as much as I believe in my country, and how it works, that I have lost faith in its people – or at least a large enough percentage of them that it matters.

My therapist gave me a great idea regarding the panic attacks I’ve been having. My pdoc is wary of prescribing anti-anxiety meds because they are addicting and I’m an alcoholic. Hell, he never wants to adjust my meds no matter what’s going on. When I see him this week, I’m going to ask for a prescription for 5 or so pills. Just something I can take when I feel an attack coming on. I think he’ll probably go for it. If he doesn’t, I’ll have to take Maurice to the next meeting. He listens much more to Maurice than me.

Weight and Fitness

Weight on Nov. 05: 256.6 lbs.
Weight on Nov, 12: 259.6 lbs.
Total gain: 3.0 lbs.

I was depressed and upset and I tried to eat away my feelings. I also didn’t get much exercise. I didn’t have the energy. The one positive is that Maurice and I had a very gluttonous night before weigh-in, so I’m hoping much of the weight I gained was bloating and sodium. Keeping my fingers crossed until next week.

Maurice and I have been trying to spend time together by walking during the evenings, which is the only time he can exercise. Unfortunately, being a morning person, that’s going to have to change because it’s too easy for me to get lazy after a hard day. When I lost a lot of weight it was when I was going to the beach and walking 6 – 10 miles every morning. We talked it over and that’s what I’ll be doing again. Unfortunately, I gained half the weight back that I lost, but that’s because I didn’t change my eating habits as much as I should. That’s going to change too. I need to keep in mind that I need both a healthy diet AND exercise together to get the weight down and keep it down.

Writing

I spent the week housesitting for a friend. I had a nice environment and office to work in and was looking forward to getting a lot of writing in. I got zip, zilch, zero done. The depression was to strong and I was too obsessive over the election results.

Synopsis

A nightmare election, a three pound weight gain, and no writing done. For the second week in a row the grade is a solid E.

  38 comments for “Weekly Wrap-Up November 14, 2016

  1. November 18, 2016 at 06:08

    I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling too, my friend, and I hope the panic attacks are better and the depression isn’t loosening its clutches. Much love, The Captain Xo

    • Bradley
      November 18, 2016 at 09:33

      Lots of love back to you, Captain

  2. November 15, 2016 at 18:25

    I meant to say also that I’m sorry you are feeling so down. I’m sending prayers and hugs your way.

    • Bradley
      November 15, 2016 at 20:19

      Thank you!

  3. November 15, 2016 at 13:48

    I know how hard this must be for you. As you say, the people he has surrounded himself with. A very dangerous man, that Trump. I’m sending you warm ((hugs))

    • Bradley
      November 15, 2016 at 13:51

      I love hugs. Hugs back to you.

  4. November 15, 2016 at 05:43

    Hi Bradley! Yes, I’ll sign the petition too.

  5. November 15, 2016 at 04:03

    I’m sorry you are still feeling this way. Many hugs to you 🙂

    • Bradley
      November 15, 2016 at 09:21

      I’m hoping it will pass soon. Big hugs back atcha.

  6. November 15, 2016 at 01:50

    Bradley, I’m sorry you’re experiencing such depression. I know how hard it can be to try to see any light in such darkness. I’m thinking of you and sending happy, healing thoughts.

    • Bradley
      November 15, 2016 at 09:20

      Thank you. I need all the healing thoughts I can get.

  7. November 14, 2016 at 23:33

    All the best to you, Bradley.

    • Bradley
      November 15, 2016 at 00:22

      To you as well, Ann

  8. November 14, 2016 at 20:12

    Don’t despair. I don’t think he (they) will get away with it. Crystal Fleming, sociology professor, says she’s going to research how Hitler came to power in Germany. She blogs about spirituality and social awareness: https://awareofawareness.com

    • Bradley
      November 14, 2016 at 20:49

      “They” is the keyword here. I hear a lot about Trump being assassinated or impeached, but that wouldn’t change anything and probably would make things worse. He’s surrounded himself with some of the most vile individuals. BTW, I would take no pleasure in an assination. I just want to be sure to make that clear.

  9. Iggy
    November 14, 2016 at 18:04

    I can’t say that I blame you for being depressed. A lot of people are feeling it after this past Tuesday, myself included. People are shouting “get over it”, but it is not so easy to get over something like this. It is going to take a lot of time. And I don’t like it one bit. My husband wanted to move to Canada several months ago, he had a couple of job offers. I told him no, I didn’t want to leave my family. Now Im wondering if I should have agreed to moving. You are not going through this alone. I hope your doc allows you a few anxiety pills to take for emergencies. And I hope you have a better coming week. I’ll be praying for you. xoxo

    • Bradley
      November 14, 2016 at 18:07

      Canada is hard to get in to, so I hope he has another opportunity if you decide you want to go.

  10. November 14, 2016 at 16:34

    Hi Bradley. The strategy of winning an election by spreading lies and using threats is psychologically abusive. It is psychologically abusive to insist that events that we have on tape never happened The GOP now dismisses the majority as silly and hysterical.

    It’s depressing and enraging.

    • Bradley
      November 14, 2016 at 18:03

      It’s depressing and enraging because they get away with it so easily

      • November 14, 2016 at 19:30

        Have you signed the petition? It’s a small act that may mean nothing to the outcome but it feels good to go on record as someone who stood for up for common decency. Almost five million people have signed it.

        https://www.change.org/p/electoral-college-electors-electoral-college-make-hillary-clinton-president-on-december-19

        • Bradley
          November 14, 2016 at 19:35

          Yes, I signed, but I’m not sure it’s a good thing. In the unlikely event it works, I believe we’d see bloodshed. A lot of it.

          • November 14, 2016 at 19:42

            It not about placing Clinton in office. It’s about letting the leaders of the democratic party know that are empowered to express our dissent — indeed we expect them to express out dissent. And with every passing day we discover that we have good reason for dissent. Did you see that Trump has already paid back Putin?

            http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/15/world/europe/putin-calls-trump.html

            • Bradley
              November 14, 2016 at 19:49

              Good point. I didn’t see the article. Checking it now.

              • November 14, 2016 at 20:18

                It’s shocking. It hasn’t even been a week and he’s talking about an alliance with Putin.

                Let me put it this way: there is nothing we can do to prevent the economic and political establishment of a new global world order with central government. The only real question is whether it will be run by the Federation or the Klingons.
                Imagine the power Putin would have with the U.S. as a second rate ally.

                • Bradley
                  November 14, 2016 at 20:52

                  Scary to think about. Very scary

                  • November 14, 2016 at 21:23

                    Yes. I’m more afraid now than I was on election night.

                    Trumps actions affirm my deepest suspicions about his ties to Putin.

                    Disinformation is a weapon designed to confuse and ultimately destroy the psychological defenses of an enemy during a time of war.

                    It is designed to subvert the trust and civil discourse so essential to the success of any democracy.

                    If this is a conspiracy then it is one that Trump and his allies are either too stupid or too arrogant to conceal.

                    I suspect the latter.

  11. November 14, 2016 at 14:13

    So sorry it’s been such a tough week. My prayers are with you, friend.

    • Bradley
      November 14, 2016 at 14:16

      Thank you. I’ll take all the prayers I can get.

  12. November 14, 2016 at 09:51

    The election results were hard to swallow and the people he continues to bring along with him are very scary. I seriously don’t understand….our country is going backwards! I am trying to live through this change which has brought me to depression as well. I would move out of the country if we had an opportunity.

    • Bradley
      November 14, 2016 at 11:38

      It may take a lot of juggling, but I hope we have the opportunity. I have no objection moving somewhere permanently, but if it’s just a short time for me to get over my bitterness, then I can live with that.

      • November 15, 2016 at 06:14

        I’m very saddened by this election and worried about what it will do to our country. I used to believe that most people were good with good intentions, but now? I will do what I can to fight back.

        • Bradley
          November 15, 2016 at 09:19

          I hope to get the energy to fight back. Normally I’d be angry and would be with the marchers each night, but it’s just not in me this time around. I hope I can recharge my batteries and regaining my will to fight.

          • November 16, 2016 at 05:42

            The thing is, we shouldn’t have to fight anymore. I’m trying to stay optimistic and hoping that the Republicans don’t undo all that has been fought for already.

            • Bradley
              November 16, 2016 at 08:11

              That’s what I’m hoping too.

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