I apologize to those who left comments earlier. I had some technical difficulties and wound up losing the entire post and the comments as well. Please don’t hesitate to comment again.
I’m not sure what to say in my first post. It’s kind of like when people start in yearbooks or letters with “What can I say?” That’s always driven me crazy.
This blog will reflect my daily thoughts, random musings as well as a record of my struggle with bipolar and weight. I’m hoping that by putting it “all out there”, that I’ll stay motivated in seeking more balance in my life.
Tomorrow I have to go to my psychiatric clinic to give blood for a test. I believe there’s a scale handy. If so, I’ll use it and be able to post my start weight (gulp). It ain’t going to be pretty. From there I’ll give more info as to what this is all about. Hopefully soon I’ll relax a bit and can put a little more fun into my posts.
That quote is from April 17, 2008 and was my first blog post. Titled “Out of the Starting Gate” it is very telling of what was to come. When people ask me why I began blogging, I tell them it was just an outlet to vent and I had no expectations anyone would read it. Now, when I read that first post, I can tell that isn’t true. If I was writing only for myself, I would not have been concerned with “putting it all out there.” In fact, my second post was an interview with myself so that readers could get to know me. In addition to wanting readers, I found the last sentence curious. I refer to putting fun into my posts. Apparently, I was not only looking for readers, but I wanted to entertain them as well.
The readers came. At first it was a few friends. Later, people with bipolar. There weren’t nearly as many mental health blogs, as there are today, so I was one of a few who helped people realize they were not alone – there was someone who understood what they were going through. Most rewarding was when friends and family members of those with bipolar started reading. The comments and the emails I received, thanking me for providing insight of what it’s like living with bipolar, overwhelmed me at times.
I was pleased to gain readership, but did I entertain? Yes, I did. I got the attention of some writers of humor blogs and they became regular readers. People who had no one in their life with bipolar, that they were aware of, began reading. They were enjoying a laugh while learning about a disease that they had no understanding of whatsoever.
Now I know why I started blogging, but, why do I blog today? The answer is, for the same reasons. Am I still entertaining? I hope so. I know my writing is no longer as witty or downright funny as it used to be, but, I have regular readers who I don’t think would come back if they are bored. They may not be laughing like they use to, but they’re still there.
Am I still helping others? I’m told I am. I’m an alcoholic and I have worked the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. For those of you unfamiliar with the details of the steps, the twelfth step reads, “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.” That’s exactly what I’m doing for bipolar disorder. I carry the message that there are many of us who understand. You don’t have to live with this disease all alone. You can learn from others and how they adapted. That, my friends, is a message worth carrying – That is why I blog.