Peanut Butter Will Be The Death Of Me

The past few days my diet has been great and I’ve been getting good exercise by walking. I was looking forward to getting on the scale in a couple of days knowing that I had dropped 50 pounds in the past week. I would be a He-Man, kicking sand in the other guys faces. (Go ask you’re parents. They’ll know what I’m talking about).

Among the many oddities about me is that I was born without a sense of smell. People have waved everything from perfume to poop under my nose and I can’t smell a thing. There’s a medical term for it, but that’s for another time. The point is that I have a sense of taste, however, taste and smell are hugely linked. As a result, my sense of taste is greatly diminished. It’s one of the reasons I hate steak. To you it may be delicious, but to me it’s just like gnawing leather since I can’t really taste it. Fortunately,most of the exceptions to my diminished taste are healthy fruits and some vegetables.

I have one deadly enemy, though…..peanut butter. It’s the devil in a jar. There’s nothing in my life I can taste so well. It’s so delicious to me I can imagine how good it smells. I picture myself in ancient Greece being fanned by palms while being spoon fed vase after vase of it’s creamy goodness. It’s sex in a jar. I love peanut butter almost more than life itself. I think you get the idea. But,do you know how much fat is in peanut butter? If you don’t and you like the stuff, NEVER EVER look at the label.

So today, I enjoyed a healthy breakfast and a healthy lunch. Mid-afternoon hit and I grabbed a handful of carrots (another one of my great pleasures), but then I could almost feel an energy mystically taking my hand and opening the pantry. There it sat like the Holy Grail singing a seductive song…Ok, I’ll spare the visualizations. I opened the lid and ate spoonfuls of the damn stuff. Up until today I haven’t restricted anything that Maurice could have in the house. He shouldn’t be punished by my lack of willpower. Sorry, my love, BUT we now have one major exception. The deadly stuff doesn’t come across our threshold ever again. Goodbye PB&J, I’ll miss you.


I saw something today that was nothing short of miraculous. Outside my apartment I heard kids laughing and giggling and having the best time. When I went out to the laundry room I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was a miracle to say the least. These two kids weren’t watching Spongebob. They weren’t plopped in front of a Disney video to keep them quiet. They weren’t playing Xbox. They were in the courtyard actually playing outside. A child outside? They should place them in the Smithsonian.

What was even more amazing were the “toys” they were playing with. It wasn’t a master blaster to shoot each other, or a battery operated motorcycle to ride, or even a skateboard. The “toys” they were playing with can be purchased at any Wal-Mart, Target or even a grocery store. Hell, they can even be purchased at the local convenience mart. These two kids were outside having the time of their life using paper plates as frisbees. These were children using their imagination and the resources they had. I thought I should call my pdoc. Obviously my meds were causing hallucinations. I didn’t call her though. Even if it was my meds I was enjoying hearing all their laughter.

10 comments on Peanut Butter Will Be The Death Of Me

  1. Hey Hey! I love’s me some peanut butter, and have decided that the best option is what we do for breakfast, toast with a thin layer, the heat melts it and it doesn’t take much AND I get my fix……I have been reading all your posts at night when I’ve collapsed from moving stuff to the new place (*never* move to the third floor without careful consideration, lol), and if I didn’t already know I liked you so much, I would now. It sounds totally hokey, but I admire your courage Brad to face the challenges you’ve been dealt and not let them break your spirit, if I didn’t know anything else about you, that would be enough to know I’m glad to call you my friend. If you ever want to just chat, you have my number or you can email me at Love ya buddy, Alaric

  2. ROFL Shiv!!!Ok – now I’ll focus :)Bradley -PB is THE BEST. I think we go through that at our house almost as often as milk. Before you bag too hard on it – and never allow it in your house again – think about the protein in PB. It is a good source of protein.When I was preg. with the twins – I could eat a spoonful of PB and not feel sick – something about the protein and the sugars that were a quick cure.Do I work for Skippy? Are you seeing this as me throwing myself in front of the bus for PB 🙂 nahhh. Keep up your hard work He-man! (Yes, I’m old enough to know who that is)*hugs*Kim

  3. mmm peanut butter! I’m gonna have to go find some chunky now, you’ve got my taste buds going!That’s a bummer you can’t taste food properly, I can’t even imagine what that would be like! Altho possibly beneficial when at High School ;)~Shiv

  4. I honestly do not like Peanute Butter – but love peanuts… go figure. At least is is good fat?Raisinettes are my Peanut Butter..But – that really isn’t what we are after here. Brad… You can do the weight loss thing. Just please do not set unrealistic goals. Take it one spoonful at a time – like you should be doing the peanut butter and before long – the weight will melt away…

  5. Yes, Dr. Nicole. You are absolutely correct. I was excited when I read a Newsweek article about 20 years ago. It actually made me realize for the first time that I couldn’t smell. Up until that time, I thought it was just not understanding what sensation I was suppose to get.

  6. Peanut Butter is one of my favorite foods. I eat my PB&J with some jalapenos on it. The sensation of the hot, creamy, and sweet just works for me. And the jalapenos increase my metabolism, so it’s not a sandwich, it’s a work out. Good luck with the diet.

  7. peanut butter and apples, or celery… or with bread. or without bread. it’s really quite something, and if you don’t go nuts (oh lord), can be a great source of protein. Mix it with a fruit and it’s a great balanced snack. the fat of the peanut butter takes longer to digest, and that continues to sustain, long after the fruit is gone… anyway. my quick thought of the day. back to drooling.

  8. @Da Old Man,”it’s not a sandwich, it’s a work out”That is my new favourite quote. Ever!~Shiv

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: