Weekly Wrap-Up November 14, 2016

weekly wrap-up

Mood

I don’t think I have to mention it, but I will. Depression, depression, depression. This time is situational and not likely to be because of the chemicals swirling around in my brain. The election was just more than I could handle. I thought it would pass, but it still hangs as heavy on my heart as much today as it did Tuesday night. It’s become more obvious that our racist, sexist, narcissistic future President plans to do as little work as possible and the people he’s surrounded himself with are just as frightening. After all, our future Vice President is an advocate for gay conversion therapy. A practice that is banned in five states. I’m trying not to get too much into politics here, but I can’t ignore it since it’s had such an impact on my mood.

I posted the other day that Maurice and I are considering leaving the country, and I had some nasty things to say about the US of A, but I’ve calmed down a bit. We’re still seriously considering moving, but I do still love my country. Like anywhere, it has its faults, but it is my home. I guess democracy in action entails risk, and with risk comes men like Donald Trump. I’m just still in shock that he won. I’ll never understand it ‘til my dying day. I guess as much as I believe in my country, and how it works, that I have lost faith in its people – or at least a large enough percentage of them that it matters.

My therapist gave me a great idea regarding the panic attacks I’ve been having. My pdoc is wary of prescribing anti-anxiety meds because they are addicting and I’m an alcoholic. Hell, he never wants to adjust my meds no matter what’s going on. When I see him this week, I’m going to ask for a prescription for 5 or so pills. Just something I can take when I feel an attack coming on. I think he’ll probably go for it. If he doesn’t, I’ll have to take Maurice to the next meeting. He listens much more to Maurice than me.

Weight and Fitness

Weight on Nov. 05: 256.6 lbs.
Weight on Nov, 12: 259.6 lbs.
Total gain: 3.0 lbs.

I was depressed and upset and I tried to eat away my feelings. I also didn’t get much exercise. I didn’t have the energy. The one positive is that Maurice and I had a very gluttonous night before weigh-in, so I’m hoping much of the weight I gained was bloating and sodium. Keeping my fingers crossed until next week.

Maurice and I have been trying to spend time together by walking during the evenings, which is the only time he can exercise. Unfortunately, being a morning person, that’s going to have to change because it’s too easy for me to get lazy after a hard day. When I lost a lot of weight it was when I was going to the beach and walking 6 – 10 miles every morning. We talked it over and that’s what I’ll be doing again. Unfortunately, I gained half the weight back that I lost, but that’s because I didn’t change my eating habits as much as I should. That’s going to change too. I need to keep in mind that I need both a healthy diet AND exercise together to get the weight down and keep it down.

Writing

I spent the week housesitting for a friend. I had a nice environment and office to work in and was looking forward to getting a lot of writing in. I got zip, zilch, zero done. The depression was to strong and I was too obsessive over the election results.

Synopsis

A nightmare election, a three pound weight gain, and no writing done. For the second week in a row the grade is a solid E.

38 comments on Weekly Wrap-Up November 14, 2016

  1. The election results were hard to swallow and the people he continues to bring along with him are very scary. I seriously don’t understand….our country is going backwards! I am trying to live through this change which has brought me to depression as well. I would move out of the country if we had an opportunity.

    1. It may take a lot of juggling, but I hope we have the opportunity. I have no objection moving somewhere permanently, but if it’s just a short time for me to get over my bitterness, then I can live with that.

      1. I’m very saddened by this election and worried about what it will do to our country. I used to believe that most people were good with good intentions, but now? I will do what I can to fight back.

        1. I hope to get the energy to fight back. Normally I’d be angry and would be with the marchers each night, but it’s just not in me this time around. I hope I can recharge my batteries and regaining my will to fight.

          1. The thing is, we shouldn’t have to fight anymore. I’m trying to stay optimistic and hoping that the Republicans don’t undo all that has been fought for already.

  2. Hi Bradley. The strategy of winning an election by spreading lies and using threats is psychologically abusive. It is psychologically abusive to insist that events that we have on tape never happened The GOP now dismisses the majority as silly and hysterical.

    It’s depressing and enraging.

        1. Yes, I signed, but I’m not sure it’s a good thing. In the unlikely event it works, I believe we’d see bloodshed. A lot of it.

              1. It’s shocking. It hasn’t even been a week and he’s talking about an alliance with Putin.

                Let me put it this way: there is nothing we can do to prevent the economic and political establishment of a new global world order with central government. The only real question is whether it will be run by the Federation or the Klingons.
                Imagine the power Putin would have with the U.S. as a second rate ally.

                  1. Yes. I’m more afraid now than I was on election night.

                    Trumps actions affirm my deepest suspicions about his ties to Putin.

                    Disinformation is a weapon designed to confuse and ultimately destroy the psychological defenses of an enemy during a time of war.

                    It is designed to subvert the trust and civil discourse so essential to the success of any democracy.

                    If this is a conspiracy then it is one that Trump and his allies are either too stupid or too arrogant to conceal.

                    I suspect the latter.

  3. I can’t say that I blame you for being depressed. A lot of people are feeling it after this past Tuesday, myself included. People are shouting “get over it”, but it is not so easy to get over something like this. It is going to take a lot of time. And I don’t like it one bit. My husband wanted to move to Canada several months ago, he had a couple of job offers. I told him no, I didn’t want to leave my family. Now Im wondering if I should have agreed to moving. You are not going through this alone. I hope your doc allows you a few anxiety pills to take for emergencies. And I hope you have a better coming week. I’ll be praying for you. xoxo

    1. “They” is the keyword here. I hear a lot about Trump being assassinated or impeached, but that wouldn’t change anything and probably would make things worse. He’s surrounded himself with some of the most vile individuals. BTW, I would take no pleasure in an assination. I just want to be sure to make that clear.

  4. I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling too, my friend, and I hope the panic attacks are better and the depression isn’t loosening its clutches. Much love, The Captain Xo

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